Outside, the streetlights were coming on and the sound of the rain continued to pitter-patter onto the street.
It had been a big day, and I could sense the students’ restlessness and fatigue building as they neared the end of their session learning how to conduct a lifestyle medicine consultation.
The professional patient continued to manfully play their role, resisting attempts by the students to address the issue of his longstanding obesity, when suddenly, there was a shift, a sudden upsurge of energy in the room, as if a switch had been turned on.
Afterwards, everyone in the room said they had also felt it.
The conversation between the student doctor and her patient now had a different intensity. It felt intimate and vulnerable.
Afterwards, I asked the ‘patient’ how he thought the consult had gone.
He looked directly at me with raised eyebrows and said,
“I don’t know what just happened, but I suddenly felt truly heard and compelled to share my real thoughts and concerns. It was as if I no longer had anywhere to hide.”
“This is so powerful! It’s wonderful.”
This is what lifestyle medicine is all about.
It’s about going beyond the tick the box questions health practitioners get taught to ask, and engaging at a deeper level, with,
- Curiosity about “What really matters to you here?”
- Showing empathy and
- Demonstrating that you not only care, but you want to work with the patient to support them in their journey to better health and well-being.
There’s a reason why health coaching is rapidly gaining traction in health care, because it’s so valuable in assisting patients to obtain the health outcomes they want.
While not currently taught in medical schools, techniques related to positive psychology, such as motivational interviewing, that help the practitioner assess a patient’s readiness to change are already being introduced.
In health coaching, you’re demonstrating your desire to treat your patient as an active and equal partner and are willing to guide and support them in their choices.
It may seem obvious that we all want to be treated as the unique individuals that we are, but I know when I’ve had to take a turn in the patient’s seat, this isn’t always our experience, especially if we sense the practitioner is feeling rushed, overwhelmed by the volume of their workload or is plain exhausted.
This is where we as practitioners, leaders or business owners have to remember that effective communication requires us to step back and ask, what do I need to share, what else do I need to know, to ensure that the person I’m interacting with has everything they need to feel seen, heard and understood?
Adopting this approach in every interpersonal interaction, at home, at work, or in the doctor’s office, is transformative because it enables and empowers greater self-responsibility and autonomy in decision-making.
Connecting to what matters.
Life always has its ups and downs. Sometimes the downs can feel like they’re dragging on too long, and sometimes we need help to overcome our roadblocks.
Working with a coach facilitates insight and movement towards your desired goal.
1. Ask, “What’s really important here?”
Because if you don’t know, it’s going to be hard for anyone else to know how best to help you. Try scheduling taking a few minutes out of your day on a regular basis to ask, “How am I going?” “Is this what I expected/desired or need?”
2. Ask, “What do I have control of here?”
It’s easy to assume we have no control, but is that strictly true? Checking in with “what’s possible?” can start to open up options and alternatives you can explore.
3. Ask, “What’s holding me back?”
Is it fear (false expectations appearing real), limiting self-beliefs or denial?
4. Ask, “Who can best help me with this?”
Here, it’s about recognising that sometimes it will be our nearest and dearest, or a close friend, or someone we don’t know terribly well, but trust. It could be a colleague, an associate or your boss. It might be someone you see as having knowledge and expertise, like a counsellor, health practitioner or financial advisor. It may be someone recommended to you by another person. Whoever it is, it’s about developing a relationship with the other person based on mutual trust and respect and a willingness to work closely with the other person to find a solution over time.
5. Ask, “Am I being seen, heard and understood in a way that will help?”
It’s not always easy to find the right words or the right person to work with.
Which is why if a current interpersonal relationship isn’t helping, it’s worth considering getting a second or third opinion.
Health coaching is an integral part of lifestyle medicine because it works so well to facilitate mindset and behaviour change.
Imagine working with your practitioner and health coach to help you get unstuck with challenges like how to reach and maintain a healthy weight, how to reverse lifestyle-related chronic disease, such as type-two diabetes or heart disease, or how to improve your mental health and well-being?
Are you having the right conversations to deliver the best outcomes for your health and well-being?
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
